We are now entering week three of self-isolation here in Ontario, Canada and I must say that despite all the insecurity and fear surrounding the pandemic, for the first time in a long time I feel peace.
I feel peace away from the traffic.
I feel peace in the neighbourhoods and in the streets.
I feel energized.
For the first time in a long time, I don’t have to worry about rushing home from work to get supper ready on time. I don’t have to worry about planning my day around the kids’ activities and worrying if I’ll be on time or not because of the traffic. I am no longer exhausted from staying up late at night to finish chores as I have a bit more extra time during the day. I can finally enjoy that cup of coffee warm in my own home, in my pyjamas while cuddling with one of the kids. It’s great. Although the implications of the pandemic are scary, I feel somewhat at peace knowing I am at home, safe, with my little ones. My anxiety levels have definitely decreased knowing that we don’t have to rush to go anywhere. It’s a welcoming break.
I must say, its not perfect: homeschooling the boys has not been easy; we have meltdowns and we have tantrums. Sometimes they just aren’t that into it. I am currently in the process of trying to get set-up to work from home. Like everything though, I’ll figure it out. With that being said, the kids’ bedtime routines have been a bit off, and I am working on creating some type of routine. But overall, the big reward to all this is that we are spending more time together. We are doing things that we would not otherwise have had the time to do and we are starting to get creative. We spend time exploring the backyard in search for nature’s treasures. We started baking almost everyday and it’s been a delight and sense of pride for the kids. I made bread for the first time and a decent Croatian apple strudel. Not bad for a novice baker.
In an odd way, the pandemic has taught me a bit more about myself and how stressed I really was. Trying to balance a career and motherhood is exhausting. But for the first time in a long time, I feel as if I am finally in tune with myself. I adapted a more gentler and slower lifestyle, which is the complete 360 to the life that I was used to. I found that since the pandemic started, I am exercising even more, despite the fact that the gym is closed. The fact that I am getting an extra hour or two of sleep as well is another added benefit. In addition, with malls being closed and whatnot, I found that I am less tempted to shop and waste money unnecessarily. Since being at home, I’ve adapted a minimalist wardrobe and I actually think its suitable for me and my taste. Perhaps living simply is the way to go.
Slowing down is a blessing in disguise.
We all need it from time to time.