It is no secret that moving can be the most stressful period of your life. The weeks leading up to our move were filled with chaos, confusion, optimism, tears and lots of red wine. Within six weeks, the last five years of our lives were all packed up in boxes. Moving certainly came with its challenges, namely a sick baby, a toddler fighting sleep and a husband busy preparing for yet another licensing exam. Despite all the obstacles that came my way, I somehow managed to get through it.
I knew eventually that “moving day” would come. When you are married to a medical resident, it is possible that relocation is in your near future. I am no stranger to this. I left Toronto in 2012 to follow him when he was matched for his residency program. I left behind the big city, my beloved job and friends. It was different though. We were just about to get married and I was excited to start the next chapter together. I was excited to embrace marriage, to leave a condo for a house and to move on to the next stage of our careers. There was a lot of positive change going around which we were both ready and excited for. However, this time around, I felt different. It was hard and I didn’t realize how hard it would be.
As he started counting down the final days of his fellowship, I too was counting down our final days in our beloved first home. Although I am extremely happy for him to embark this new chapter in his career, I couldn’t help but feel sad. I was sad to leave behind a home we built for nearly five years. It was also was hard for me to leave behind the many friends we had met over the years and the relationships we made. Furthermore, I had a difficult time coming to the realization that I had to start all over again: reacquainting myself in a new city, making new friends, and possibly trying to transfer my job. I couldn’t understand why I felt this way seeing that I knew that ultimately we would move once his fellowship was over. When we sold our house I cried every night for a week. It took a while for reality to sink in, but hey, here we are and we got through it.
As difficult the task of packing was, it gave me a chance to reminisce about our early beginnings. I will never forget the excitement we had as a newly married couple and entering our home for the first time. I remember the times when we went shopping to find accent pieces and decor to make our house more of a home. In this house we hosted many events and had many date “nights in” to ourselves. We also filled our house with love: it was in our first home we found out that we were expecting. But this was just one of many “firsts:” first birthdays and Christmases, first steps, first tooth and first words.
I guess you could say that the idea of moving is bittersweet. We simply didn’t live in our home but we created a life there. And as hard as this move was for me, I remind myself that this is not the end of our story, rather, the next chapter in our life together. Although I am a little hesistant to start all over again, its this excitement of the unknown that makes this journey special and unique: it is just one piece in the story of us.